Posts tagged ‘Ukip racist’

April 30, 2015

Farage to enlist UK Gold and Granada Television in war against BBC

by philapilus

The Beeb will rue the day it went up against a highly polished organisation like Ukip…

Ukip has said that it will completely bypass the BBC, and communicate only via TV channels embracing “traditional British values”, for the remainder of its election campaign.

The party announced its war on the BBC after Nigel Farage took offence at a dig made against him on its flagship satirical show, Have I got News For You.

Ukip spokeswoman, Gina Flange, said “I think it’s disgraceful that a BBC documentary programme

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May 19, 2014

Scientific study links tiredness to racism

by philapilus

DON’T wake him up; it’s basically this or genocide.

Research published today in the British Medical Journal links lack of sleep to racist outbursts, conspiracy theorising, and pathological nostalgia for the 1950s.

The study, published today, coincides neatly with Nigel Farage’s defence of apparent racism in a recent interview, on the grounds that he was very, very tired.

The report’s author, Dr Mike Ock, said “Actually, Mr Farage is a very important case in point here. It’s not that he is a frothing at the mouth moron, he just needs some sleep.”

Farage was destroyed by

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May 14, 2014

Farage: ‘No biggie; students all look the same to me anyway’

by philapilus

“This is my invisible tortoise. It’s juicy.”

After a prominent student-member quit UKIP over its racist campaigning, Nigel Farage announced that he couldn’t care less, because “they all look the same to me anyway.”

Sanya-Jeet Thandi, who had been something of a poster-girl for UKIP because she isn’t a belligerent, middle-aged white man, blogged that she was quitting the party’s youth wing, Young Independence.

But Nigel Farage said “What’s one more or less? They should all go back to where they came from anyway.

“Did you know that students are actually descended from a different sort of monkey from us? And, what’s

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January 7, 2014

“I will become more insane” vows Farage

by philapilus

“Tell you what; you know how we keep having to insist we’re not racist? We could stop doing that for starters…”

Nigel Farage has promised to up his game today, after media claims that his views no longer sufficiently alienated most of the UK.

As a survey revealed that over 75% of the British public now wanted immigration cut, concerns rose amongst senior UKIP members that they might no longer be seen as the batshit-mad party, and could even gain support from ordinarily quite rational people.

On learning of the troubling statistics during a press Q&A, Mr Farage appeared initially puzzled, then increasingly panic-stricken, and eventually

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May 2, 2013

Nazi Germany “Full of people pretending to be pot-plants”

by philapilus
A mass rally on Tempelhof field, 1 May 1935

This crowd were pretending to be a large garden-centre. Obviously.

A new history of the Third Reich by Nigel Farage has made the bold and novel claim that the vast majority of people in the country were swept up in a faddish craze which is only now beginning to be understood.

In Why it’s Fine to Goosestep Farage states that, contrary to the popular belief that Germany was in thrall to a bunch of racist chubnuts, the 1930s and 1940s were characterised by “A really jolly craze, in which people pretended to be pot-plants. I believe it was as widespread then as Gangnam is now. Whatever that is.”

His thesis came to light after he was able to explain that a Ukip candidate was not, in fact, making a Nazi salute in a photograph discovered online, but was imitating a pot-plant, whilst

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