Posts tagged ‘Steven Gerrard’

May 29, 2014

Roy Hodgson sends Stephen Hawking proposal for complete theory of the universe

by philapilus

“For-God’s-Sake-Is-The-Referee-Blind-Or-Something?”

Following Professor Stephen Hawking’s comprehensive predictions of exactly how and why England will lose the 2014 World Cup, Roy Hodgson has reciprocated by offering Hawking a Grand Theory of Everything.

Hodgson’s theory has brought together the disparate strands of modern physics, and, if correct, will revolutionise human understanding.

The England manager hypothesises that “The multiverse can best be understood as something like a tube of Smarties, with the logo accidentally printed on the inside, which has been emptied by a playful kitten, and then stretched out with a medieval torture rack, before being scrunched up by an angry Northern housewife, and then shaped into a frog by an origami expert from Merthyr Tydfil.”

Professor Hawking said “I have

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