Posts tagged ‘Johnny Depp’

May 14, 2015

“DEATH TO DEPP’S DOGS!!” screams Australian Minister

by philapilus

Just look at those eyes – it can’t wait to sink its fangs into a kangaroo’s jugular

Barnaby Joyce, Australian agricultural minister, is on a mission to personally murder the dogs belonging to Johnny Depp, according to the British media.

Depp took his dogs on his private jet when he flew in to Australia last month,┬áto film ‘Pirates of the Caribbean 37: Now it’s just getting stupid’. Crucially however, he neglected to declare he was bringing in the animals.

Joyce said “That bloody Depp’s got to pay! I’m going to string those dogs up by the bollocks, and slit ’em down the front with a blunt knife, then chuck the entrails on a barby and

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November 8, 2013

BBC reveals Johnny Depp is ‘made of cake’

by philapilus
Jack Sparrow (Madame Tussauds, London).

Those dreadlocks are actually made of liquorice

The BBC has made the extremely surprising discovery that actor Johnny Depp is actually made entirely of cake.

Depp, whose works include the enormously successful ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ quadrilogy, has more often than not been seen as the ‘eye candy’ in his films, but few people – if any – in the industry were aware quite how literal this was.

Professor Hamish McEyebrau, of the Slough School of Scary Sweetstuffs, said “I think that everyone just assumed his

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