Posts tagged ‘horse-racing’

October 2, 2013

McCririck Tribunal told ‘It’s not his age, it’s his terrifying face’

by philapilus

The employment tribunal investigating the dismissal of 73-year old John McCririck, has been told by Channel 4’s commissioning editor for sport to “Take a long hard look at his sideburns, and tell me you wouldn’t try and get him sectioned, too”.

John McCririck headshot

For a while this specially designed headgear held the creatures at bay, but they soon escaped from the flaps

Jamie Aitchison said to the panel adjudicating on the case “It’s not ageism. I’m all for watching old people on TV; they’re hilarious. Like that time Thora Hird fell off a Churchill stairlift and didn’t stop rolling till the bottom step.

“Hilarious.”

Aitchison claimed that racing-pundit McCririck was instead fired after a long-standing battle over his facial hair.

“We said ‘John; it’s

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December 7, 2012

“Tis jus’ me magic fairy dust!” cries Dettori

by philapilus
A leprechaun counts his gold in this engraving...

it’s hardly surprising really: why else would jockeys go so quickly from happy to fighty to miserable?

Italian leprechaun and jockey Frankie Dettori said this morning that he is extremely upset about the six-month ban that French racing authorities have handed him.

Dettori tested positive for a banned substance in September, believed to be cocaine. But the three-time British champion refutes this charge, and insisted “No to be sure, twas me magic dust! Begorrah; we leprechauns all use it, otherwise how else would we get on something as big as a horse, begad?”

Jean Michel Jarre, spokesman for the stereotypically French racing authority, France Galop, said “Hawhehaw, zis little man, he has been – how you say in English? – taking ze piss, no? He is doing ze coke, and he expect us to

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