Posts tagged ‘Harry’

January 22, 2013

“I can’t stop killing” admits Harry

by philapilus
English: Prince William of Wales & Prince Henr...

William is said to be so frightened that he will only travel with Harry in an open-topped vehicle, so that everyone can see exactly what his brother is doing

Prince Harry surprised journalists yesterday when he revealed openly that he has killed people. The prince was interviewed after his most recent tour in Afghanistan as a helicopter commander, when he dropped the bombshell – presumably literally.

“I have always felt that, prince or no, I have a job to do,” said Prince Harry, “and that job inevitably involves killing people. But more than that, it’s something that I feel I need to do, something to which I have been called, you might say.”

He went on “And some of those killings were made in my official capacity as a member of the armed forces. Granted, not the majority of them, but a fair few, all the same.”

The prince, who is also known as ‘Captain Wales’, ‘Herr Nazi Kommandant’, and ‘That idiot who was

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March 12, 2012

“I was completely off my tits” says Prince

by philapilus
Cocaine powder

"This is rally good shit, homies"

An aide to Prince Harry has issued an important correction to all the newspaper stories which reported that the Prince had been ‘choked up’ on his recent Commonwealth tour.

Apparently Harry had actually admitted to being ‘coked up’, but due to an over-reliance on Microsoft spellcheck – stemming from piss-poor education – virtually every Fleet Street Royal Correspondent had managed to misrepresent the Prince.

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