Posts tagged ‘FGM’

February 6, 2017

FGM rates prove humanity still full of utter bastards

by philapilus

‘What the fuck is wrong with people?’

The horrific revelation that English medical professionals deal with a victim of FGM every hour has confirmed that humanity is still chock full of evil little shits.

Professor Hamish McEyebrau, of the Slough Institute for Counting Bastards, said  “Credulous fuckwits are hacking off bits of the genitalia of little girls for so-called cultural and religious reasons, and they don’t show any sign of stopping anytime soon.

“That shit still happens. In 2017.These

read more »

Tags: ,
February 26, 2014

Shock at possibility Michael Gove might do something right

by philapilus
Michael_Gove_at_Policy_Exchange_delivering_his_keynote_speech_'The_Importance_of_Teaching'There has been widespread surprise this morning, at the news that Michael Gove is thinking of doing something that isn’t a) evil or b) stupid.

The Education Secretary has said he will write to every school in England about the practise of female genital mutilation, and in a rare display of good judgement, will actually condemn the hideous practise.

Teacher and campaigner, Wendy Nailinthehead, said “Providing his brain doesn’t melt at the effort of not deliberately ruining everything for a change, Mr Gove may actually make a helpful

read more »

June 24, 2013

Satan “very excited” about meeting FGM perpetrators

by philapilus
Gustave Doré, Depiction of Satan, the antagoni...

“Jesus Christ; and people say I’M bad?!”


Lucifer, the Son of Perdition and Ruler of the Abyss, said this morning that he was thoroughly looking forward to receiving into Hell the people who subjected a 7 year old girl to female genital mutilation (FGM).

After reading that in the last 2 years alone the NHS has treated 1700 women who have suffered the ritual cutting, His Dark Satanic Majesty Beelzebub announced “I am going to have a whale of a time entertaining myself with these fuckers for the rest of eternity.

“Seriously, I mean I have some really horrible stuff going on down here 24/7, but I am going to find something new for

read more »