Posts tagged ‘Election debate’

June 1, 2017

Election: May misses leader debate to heal the sick and minister to the needy

by philapilus
File:Theresa May MP.JPG

“Scared? Don’t make me laugh!” said May from several hundred miles away

Theresa May announced this morning that her decision not to attend last night’s televised debate between party leaders was “absolutely not down to abject terror” and was purely because she was “busy ministering to the sick and needy”.

May said that she didn’t have time to waste on unimportant matters like being accountable to the country on live TV, or answering questions that people really want the answers to before they vote on who will run the country.

“That would have been

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March 5, 2015

Miliband going round saying he ‘could totally have’ Cameron

by philapilus

“I could basically be in UFC”

Ed Miliband has been walking round like a puffed-up pigeon and asking girls if they want to feel his biceps, after David Cameron today ruled out taking him on in a one-on-one.

The Labour leader said “Dave is well-scared. I was all like ‘Come on then; let’s have it!’, and he was all like ‘Um…oh…I’m not free that day, um…I’ve got a note from my mum… please don’t hurt me!’

“It’s cos he knows how well hard I am. Do you want to

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