Posts tagged ‘Ed Miliband bacon sandwich’

May 6, 2015

Cameron unveils final election slogan: “Miliband’s a cunt who can’t eat bacon properly”

by philapilus

As the Sun so brilliantly puts it; a cause celebre for our times

As party leaders tear around the country hunting last-minute votes, David Cameron has revealed a final campaign slogan; Miliband is a cunt who can’t even eat a bacon sandwich properly. Vote for me.’

With polls opening in less than 24 hours, Mr Cameron said it was time for voters to focus on the coalition’s record “In particular our most major success; not being photographed making a mess of eating a bacon sandwich.”

The Prime Minister said “I have told Red ‘gay’ Ed, time and again, that if he’d attended Eton he would know sandwich etiquette. He did not, and he does not. Tomorrow is about

read more »

Advertisements
April 9, 2015

British politicians ‘too thick to feed themselves’

by philapilus
graph

“We did a graph”

A groundbreaking study has discovered that many MPs lack the basic intelligence required to open their mouths and put food in.

Research undertaken at the Slough School of Thick found that political success was inversely related to managing-to-feed-yourself success.

Professor Hamish McEyebrau, author of the report, said “We began our project some time back, trying to find out why Ed Miliband couldn’t eat a bacon sandwich.

“But we

read more »