The US Navy has confirmed that the Carl Vinson strike group “could be pretty much anywhere”.
A spokesperson said “Look, when we said we were sending warships to North Korea we were expressing a sort of passing notion, not actual military tactics.
making no difference at all since 2012
The mighty Chinese military machine has launched an all-out assault on Australia, after Australian swimmer Mack Horton called defending champion Sun Yang a drugs cheat.
Horton won gold in the men’s 400m freestyle, whilst Sun took silver, but the ‘drug cheat’ slur had been in comments Horton made before the match.
Donald Trump has spoken out against the parents of a dead Muslim soldier, after they accused him of never having made sacrifices for his country.
Ghazala and Khizr Khan, parents of US Army captain Humayun Khan, said Trump did not understand Islam or sacrifice, leading the Republican candidate to retort with a waggle of his jowls and a shriek of bestial rage.
Excerpts from the long-awaited Chilcot Report, leaked exclusively to TMB this evening, reveal the prime culprit of the Iraq War – believed to have contributed to the death of almost half a million Iraqis, as the country slid into chaos following the US-led invasion of 2003 – to be none other than international jewel thief Douglas Vanderbildt.
The Daily Mail newspaper has announced a charitable appeal in order to raise funds for Michael Adebolago’s dental work.
The newspaper learned that the killer of Lee Rigby had lost two front teeth whilst being restrained by prison officers, and immediately decided to help.
The shooting down of a Russian warplane by Turkish jets has inadvertently brought about an international detente, after major powers agreed that things were clearly out of hand.
President Putin said “This has given me pause to reflect and to think about all kinds of things in a calm and measured way.
Leaked documents have revealed that IS is completely flummoxed over why the whole world hasn’t seen how brilliant Islamism is, in the wake of its latest attack.
Intelligence analysts intercepted communiques in which senior IS members admit to one another their shock and confusion at not being invited to rule the globe.
David Cameron will lay out his new strategy for dealing with the mass migration problem this afternoon, which is expected to involve having a quick whip round for a commiserations card and a bouquet of flowers from a petrol station.
Sources close to the Prime Minister say he “will praise the courage of Syrian refugees, before promising to send the posey of flowers – and possibly a pack of Rich Tea biscuits that he’s had in the cupboard for ages and which no one has eaten.”
Experts analysing the vast tape collection of Osama Bin Laden have revealed that the Al Qaeda leader “was a huge fan of bands like the Bangles, the Mamas and the Papas, and British folk rock outfit, Steeleye Span.”
Professor Hamish McEyebrau of the Slough School of Sound Studies went through more than 1500 casettes, and found that Bin Laden’s musical tastes tended to focus on anything recorded before Nirvana’s ‘Nevermind’, which was the most recent album that he owned.
CNN has said ISIS is “completely thrilled” by the US Supreme Court’s decision to legalise gay marriage nationwide.
The revelation came after star correspondent Lucy Pawle reported spotting the fundamentalist religious organisation’s flag at a gay pride event in London.
A spokesman for CNN said “I know you’re all probably quite surprised by this, but ISIS are huge fans of gay marriage. Or ‘marriage’ as we should all just get used to calling it.