Nuttall defends ‘died at Hillsborough’ claim

by philapilus

Nuttall also died during the Falklands war, and was sitting next to Diana in the car crash that claimed both their lives

Paul Nuttall, the man who is running Ukip while Nigel Farage is towelling off Donald Trump, has hit back at critics who say he did not in fact die during the Hillsborough stadium disaster.

Speaking at a carboot sale this morning, Mr Nuttall said “These so-called fact-checkers are trying to tell me that I didn’t die during what might have been the greatest stadium related tragedy  of 1989.

“But they can go fuck themselves. I definitely did.”

The Ukip leader continued “Look, let’s be logical about this. Why would I say I had died if I actually hadn’t, what could I possibly hope to gain?

“Some of these bastards have said I am trying to cash in on people’s deeply-felt emotions to score cheap political points. But why on earth would I do that?!  I mean what use could that possibly be to me, given that I died nearly 30 years ago?

“Why would trying to get the word Hillsborough associated with my name do me any favours at all? How could it? Simply put, it can’t, I’m dead, and that’s an end to it. Hillsborough Hillsborough Hillsborough.

“Now that that’s all cleared up, make sure when you vote that you bear in mind that I laid down my life for you lot at Hillsborough. If anyone deserves to run this country, it’s me. Also look at this picture of the sad puppy. It will cheer up if you vote Ukip.”



%d bloggers like this: