People who voted for stupid thing ‘not to blame if it was protest vote’

by philapilus

“All I said was ‘hey let’s just keep going’, but you should have ignored me; it’s not my fault I’m a moron”

People who have voted for something really fucking awful are not to blame when it happens provided the vote was only a protest vote, according to themselves.

Wendy Nailinthehead, who voted for an enraged baboon to usurp the office of President of the United States said “It’s not my fault that we now have a shrieking primate in charge of the country, waggling his turkey-neck and waving his tiny hands.

“I only voted for him in protest against the establishment, and its corrupt establishment ways such as putting establishment-loving humans in positions of power, rather than an unsightly, shit-throwing, howling ape.”

On the other side of the Atlantic Tim Twanks, who voted for his country to ‘take back control’ by reverting to World War II levels of isolation, said “When I talked about the need to get rid of experts and bring back a bit of the Blitz spirit, I didn’t think I would actually be foraging for luxuries like acorns and watching my house value drop to less than the price of a bag of flour.

“But I am categorically not responsible for my own actions, because I was only trying to stick it to the man. I just didn’t realise that man was me.”

Profeasor Hamish McEyebrau, of the Slough School of Christ, What Did I Just Do, said “The current state of the world could be compared to a plane where the passengers voted to strangle the crew and invade the cockpit, only to discover that it is full of instruments they don’t know how to use.

“On the bright side, they don’t need to worry about the very complex technology though, because a fucking great mountain is about to make the whole situation go away very, very quickly.”

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