Farage and Trump to go on date

by philapilus

“Look I know you’re not happy about it, but he just…*gets* me, Melania, and that’s all there is to it.”

Nigel Farage and Donald Trump have agreed to go for a pint and maybe a dinner at Pizza Express, after hitting it off earlier in the week.

Farage spoke at a Trump rally, likening the glorious American future under Trump to the glorious British future post-Brexit, highlighting the glorious lack of ethnic minorities and money.

A Trump aide said “As Donald watched Nigel a light came into his eyes, and he began to gently caress his own nipples. By the end of the speech he was salivating.

“Farage and Trump shared a long handshake after the event, and Donald said ‘You know, I know speakers, I know the best speakers, people say I know speakers, and you are a great speaker Nigel’.

“Farage responded by spreading Marmite over his forehead and speaking for some time to a window, whilst Donald watched in delight. Then the big man said ‘Nige; your crazy matches my crazy! It’s like you complete me’. It was quite a beautiful moment.”

The two men have agreed on a Friday night dinner-date. Sources suggest the pair have left open the option to go out afterwards if the meal goes well, either to a midget wrestling contest or a Klan rally, depending on how the mood takes them.

%d bloggers like this: