Britain only allowed to vote for TV talent shows in future

by philapilus

You can vote for this, but NOTHING ELSE

Britain has been told that it should restrict itself to voting on completely pointless shit like Saturday night talent shows, and must now refrain from ever voting on anything that matters.

Experts stressed the importance of Britain never going near a ballot box again, after the country effectively voted in favour of jumping off a very tall cliff to see how much it hurt when you hit the ground.

Professor Hamish McEyebrau, of the Slough School for Studying Stupidity, said “With the UK having decided to leave the EU on the basis that Rupert Murdoch said it would be great, we are recommending immediate suspension of the vote.

“They’ll only hurt themselves. It’s like putting an infant in front of a power socket and handing it a fork and a jug of water.”

Britain will still be encouraged to spend its time watching TV shows where semi-famous people dance badly, or dogs walk tightropes, and can merrily vote away on which talentless fuckwit it finds least unappealing.

But the country has been warned that under no circumstances should it even consider venturing into politics or anything which has real world consequences.

Professor McEyebrau said “By the way Britain, ‘consequences’ is a word you might want to look up.”

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