Breaking the law “fine if you don’t know you’re doing it” says Boris

by philapilus

He used the same excuse when he murdered those gypsies too

Bungling London mayor Boris Johnson has defended giving his wife a ‘backie’ on his bike, saying that “Breaking the law doesn’t count unless you are fully aware you are doing something illegal.”

After being filmed carrying his wife on the back of his bicycle, Boris was said to be angered that people were accusing him of breaking the law, telling reporters “Bloody ridiculous, how can you break a law if you don’t even know it’s a law?!

“You couldn’t break a, you know, a – a thing for flowers, thing with flowers in, vase, that’s it, vase! You couldn’t break one of those without knowing it was a…hang on. No that’s not the same, is it?

“But you couldn’t break a…well, there’s lots of things you couldn’t break. Point is I didn’t know it was wrong, despite my extensive knowledge of cycling, ergo, it wasn’t. Ok?”

The Mayor’s office has insisted that ordinary Londoners will not be allowed to use the ‘I didn’t know it was wrong’ excuse to escape repurcussions from any acts of illegality, nor will they be able to get let off with a “Ooh you are naughty” if caught.

Sir Bernard Hogan-Howe, Commissioner of the Metropolitan Police said “A lot of people have asked if we shouldn’t have at least cautioned Boris, claiming that we no longer live in a country where toffs can do whatever they want and everybody else can be thrown in the stocks at the wave of an aristocratic hand.

“To which I always reply ‘Of course we still fucking do’.”

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