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“God told me to find them, bless their sweet little paws”
The former Leader of the Opposition Ed Miliband has been found wandering up and down motorways rescuing kittens, according to Thames Valley Police.
Making a statement to the press, PC McGarry of the Missing Politicians unit, said “I can confirm that having disappeared after his disastrous electoral defeat almost a month ago, Ed was found by a patrol vehicle, cycling along the hard shoulder of the M4 with a net and a little cage containing several feral cats.”
Mr Miliband initially pretended to be a Welshman called Dai Cheesebag, but officers found his House of Commons pass in his jacket pocket and
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