Pacquiao-Mayweather fight, blow-by-blow

by philapilus

Pacman got less of the money than Money did

Manny Pacquaio v Floyd Mayweather is over, but only TMB’s boxingologists can give you the complete breakdown:

Both men entered the arena in the normal way, using their feet, which, being located at the end of their legs, made for adequate bipedal locomotion. Next they climbed into the roped-off bit, which seemed to go pretty well too.

Neither boxer fell over.

A shouty man shouted for a bit, and then the fighters started hitting each other.

The first round opened with an impressive million by Floyd, and a series of counters from Manny, each containing about  $450,000-$900,000. The trading continued, with values ranging from high hundred-thousands up to a couple of $1m beauties.

Rounds 2 to 4 were marked with adrenaline and excitement, all of it solidly profitable, if lacking in winning deposits. Manny took off one of his gloves to stuff cash into, while Mayweather tended to stand back with an open sack.

Quality-wise, the thick wads of hundreds exchanged were weighty enough – though neither boxer  showered the other with handfuls of solid shiny metal.

The boxing became increasingly conservative, with Mayweather using huge bundles of notes to construct a defensive barricade. A brilliant Manny Haymaker in Round 7 didn’t really make any hay, but did make at least $3m.

Big moneyshots weren’t enough to disrupt Mayweather’s defensive masterclass however; his use of the back foot alone garnered twenty million in the latter part of the match.

The much-anticipated bag of gold bullion bars to the head Manny was hoping to unleash never materialised, and the fight was technically proficient if underwhelming. Money landed mostly accurately, and though some fell on the floor,  both fighters managed to pick up really quite a lot of it.

The result was never in doubt though; a unanimous decision of $180m to $120m in favour of Mayweather.

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