Elderly lady falls over at Brits

by philapilus
File:Madonna à Nice 30 2.jpg

“In MY day everyone was respectable and wore ties”

There was bemusement at the Brit Awards last night, after a confused OAP wandered onto the stage during a song, and then fell down some stairs.

The woman, Ms M. Ciccone, seemed unharmed after the fall. Although members of the dance troupe then on stage tried to help her, she pushed them away, scolding “You young ‘uns don’t know you’re born! I’ve  fallen over more times than you’ve had hot dinners!”

She then fell over again, breaking an ankle, which left her squawking in pain for several minutes, to the consternation of the audience, sitting in stunned silence.

Event organisers attempted to cover up the screechings with an instrumental track, but this only gave the impression she was attempting – poorly – to sing.

There was relief all around when paramedics arrived and ushered her into a waiting ambulance.

Organisers have promised to install a stairlift for the elderly and infirm before next year’s ceremony, and it is understood that Injurylawyers4u.com followed the ambulance to hospital, bellowing “HAVE YOU HAD AN ACCIDENT WHICH WASN’T YOUR FAULT WITHIN THE LAST 6 MONTHS?” through a loudspeaker.

Ms Ciccone’s great-grandson said this morning “Nana escaped from the old folk’s home yesterday afternoon, and we’ve been worried sick about her.

“I say ‘worried sick’; it was more a case of rolling the eyes, and muttering ‘Oh that Nana, she’s a one!’ before settling down for the night. We’d probably have gone out to look for her, but the Brits were on, and we’d already bought the crisps. Besides, I had a tenner on that Ed Sheeran for Best Album.

“We were pretty surprised to see her on TV, but ultimately glad she broke her ankle, as she’ll have to stay put in the nursing home for a bit now. We’ll probably visit in a month or two, unless there’s something good on the telly.”

 

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