“Would you say you’re about to die any moment now?” BBC asks D-Day veterans

by philapilus
D-day veterans on Sword Beach as a military aircraft flys past

Oh, get on with it

Reporters covering the ceremonies for the 70th anniversary of D-Day, have spent the morning interviewing the handful of veterans who are still alive – principally about when this state of affairs will cease to exist.

BBC defence correspondent Caroline Wyatt said “I am here in Normandy with Major Lesley Fanshawe-Haines-Haines, one of the last surviving field commanders from the Landings.

“Major, you’re very, very old; do you think you’ll die in the next few minutes? Maybe even during this interview? Are you sure? Well, what if you tried a bit harder, perhaps?”

The bewildered huddle of attending nonagenarians – who saw thousands of comrades cut down, in the fervent belief that you should be free to watch as much Big Brother as you like -were harried so continuously that at one point President Obama had to cease his speech to Shush the gaggle of journalists.

Wyatt explained “This is the last big anniversary that veterans will be alive enough to attend. Yes, a few may come next year, but that’ll be the 71st anniversary. And that’s less of a big deal than the 70th. Although, of course, it is a bigger number.

“But it’s not, you know, special, like 70 is. Or 80. Or even if we just did 60 again.”

94 year old Roland Parker said “I remember when all this was just beaches. No cafes, TV vans, or crowds of journalists. Just beautiful beaches. And several thousand eviscerated dead people. Now could you, you know, stop asking when I’ll die, please?

“Look, I already have the Grim Reaper standing behind my armchair all day, tapping a skeletal foot and pointedly checking his watch every few minutes.

“The last thing I need is the bloody BBC waiting to record  my final exhalation for posterity, and the subsequent involuntary bowel movement.”

Advertisements
%d bloggers like this: