Scientific study links tiredness to racism

by philapilus

DON’T wake him up; it’s basically this or genocide.

Research published today in the British Medical Journal links lack of sleep to racist outbursts, conspiracy theorising, and pathological nostalgia for the 1950s.

The study, published today, coincides neatly with Nigel Farage’s defence of apparent racism in a recent interview, on the grounds that he was very, very tired.

The report’s author, Dr Mike Ock, said “Actually, Mr Farage is a very important case in point here. It’s not that he is a frothing at the mouth moron, he just needs some sleep.”

Farage was destroyed by James O’Brien in an interview for LBC radio, in which experts say he “made such a massive cock of himself” that the UKIP press spokesman tried to step in to stop the interview.

But Dr Ock said today that “My research indicates Mr Farage was probably just plum-tuckered out, when he accused Romanians of living in his dustbin and plotting to steal all his hair whilst he was asleep.

“Similarly, last week when he blacked up his face with a burnt cork during a press conference, and ran around screaming ‘Ugga bugga ugga bugga! Me heap big thief!’, what he was really saying was that he needed forty winks.

Dr Ock says that the same is almost certainly true of Gordon Fergusson. Fergusson is the UKIP candidate in Southport, Lancashire, who has called for the hanging of opponent pro-EU politicians and voters, for treason against the state.

Dr Ock said “Fergusson is not completely insane, he doesn’t live in Imaginationland, he is just very, very tired. He needs sleep. A LOT of sleep.

“Well, either that or he’s completely insane. I can’t decide. I’m quite tired.”

 

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To offset any political bias imputed to our coverage of Mr Farage’s brilliant antics, we would like to take this opportunity to add that  Labour and the Conservatives are also massive, massive twats. But none of them are quite as bad as the massive, collective knob-end that is the Liberal Demcrats.

 

 

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