Giant rodent ‘Morganzilla’ found in Swedish kitchen

by philapilus

Many Swedes say they have been unable to sleep since seeing pictures of the rodent, and feel constantly sullied and dirty.

Pictures of a giant Piers Morgan caught in a trap have taken Swedish social media by storm, after a Stockholm family captured the oversize rodent in their kitchen.

Father of four, Eric Ericsson, said to Swedish SVT news “We noticed a foul stench coming from the kitchen, accompanied by a horrible chattering sound.

“I opened the door, and there was this horrible creature sitting there, it’s massive, bloated head between its legs so it could lick its own anus. The family was terrified.”

Mr Ericsson said the family had known there was a pest in the house, as for some weeks previously they kept finding the phone line had been tampered with, and had bitemarks and saliva all over it. They tried conventional mousetraps, without success.

But after actually seeing the Piers Morgan, Mr Ericsson rushed out and bought an XXXL sized rodent-trap ‘big enough for a pig’, in which the Piers was captured some days later.

Ericsson’s wife, Erica, said “We were shocked by the size of it. I mean, I’d seen the show on CNN, but I never imagined it was as big and ugly as this. That’s where the ‘Morganzilla’ title came from.”

Pest control were immediately called round to finish the Piers Morgan off, as the spring trap had failed to break it’s tough neck.

But after injecting the rodent with every known poison, exterminators realised that the creature had such a high-level of natural toxicity, that it was immune to all other forms of venom, toxin, or chemical or biological agents.

Mr Ericsson said “The last I heard, they were taking it to England, where I understand it will euthanised by Ian Hislop, with a double-barrelled shotgun to the face.

“Good riddance.”

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