Shock at possibility Michael Gove might do something right

by philapilus
Michael_Gove_at_Policy_Exchange_delivering_his_keynote_speech_'The_Importance_of_Teaching'There has been widespread surprise this morning, at the news that Michael Gove is thinking of doing something that isn’t a) evil or b) stupid.

The Education Secretary has said he will write to every school in England about the practise of female genital mutilation, and in a rare display of good judgement, will actually condemn the hideous practise.

Teacher and campaigner, Wendy Nailinthehead, said “Providing his brain doesn’t melt at the effort of not deliberately ruining everything for a change, Mr Gove may actually make a helpful intervention.

“Granted it’s only a letter, but it’s a step up from an email, and a leap forward from reintroducing Victorian-style education.”

Campaigner Fahma Mohamed, who is only 17 but still knows more than Gove does, managed to get a petition going that garnered nearly 250,000 signatures.

To put that in context that’s nearly 250,000 people more than have ever managed to get the Education Secretary to do something not utterly fuckwitted before.

Mr Gove said “Cutting and mutilating girls’ bodies is… hang on, definitely remember this… ah yes, wrong. It’s wrong? We utterly condone it.

“Do I mean condone? Or condemn?

“Look, whatever Fahma Mohamed and all those other people said, that’s what I think. Can I be David Cameron’s successor now?”

The Guardian, which also did something unusually useful, by backing the campaign and linking to the petition online, has today printed ‘GUARDIAN-BACKED ANTI-FGM CAMPAIGN’ on every single page of the newspaper, instead of publishing any articles.

Meanwhile, editor Alan Rusbridger has reportedly spent all morning making halos out of cardboard wrapped in tin-foil, and distributing them to every member of his staff.

Ms Nailinthehead said “It’s amazing really. There’s actually been a good – if somewhat ineffectual result. All it took was a quarter of a million people to tell Michael Gove something, and he got it nearly straight after.”

%d bloggers like this: